Holiday Shoppers and My Super Power

Dear Holiday Shoppers, 

 You are not entitled to bulldoze me and my son to save yourself four seconds of time. You are not entitled to block an entire lane way, aisle, or lineup so you can check your shopping list or talk to Mary Christmas about fruit cake. You are not entitled to mosey through the store like it's a rainy day. It's Christmas, the big guy is coming, chop chop. You are not entitled to steal my cart. You are not entitled to bud in line. And you are certainly not entitled to fight me for a parking spot - GET YOUR OWN and STEP DOWN OFF OF YOUR CHRISTMAS PEDESTAL. 

 

Yours truly, 

No Longer Enjoy Holiday Shopping

 

I don't understand it. Why are we so rude to strangers during the holiday season? We're suppose to be kind to each other and share the joy the holiday brings. We're suppose to be considerate of each other and smile more. 

 

I find myself giving dirty looks or sighing out loud or telling people where to stick their candy canes. I used to LOOOOOVE Christmas shopping. This year, I almost cried in Walmart because some mean woman rammed her cart in to mine. I didn't deserve it. Had my son been in the cart, I would have found my fingers wrapped around her throat. 

 

Where is the Christmas Spirit? What is Christmas Spirit? When I was younger, I thought it meant believing in Santa Claus. When I was a teenager, I thought it was the happy, heightened mood I felt Christmas morning. In university, I drank a cranberry, cinnamon, and vodka Christmas Spirit. 

 

I still like to believe in the idea of Santa Claus. I still feel warm, fuzzy, and smiley Christmas morning. And I certainly enjoy a holiday beverage Christmas eve. I also love the reflection of the twinkling lights on the snow. I love decorating my Christmas tree. I love sharing a buffet of food with my family. And I love Christmas baking. 

 

To me, the Spirit of Christmas is the bounce in my step. It's the liveliness of my home when it's decorated in red and green. It's the smell of cinnamon and pine. It's the anticipation of snow. It's the giddiness in my child - and also in me. It's the idea of harmony, and peace, and love. 

 

So ram your cart in to me. Bud in line. Throw stuff at me. You can't bring me down with you. I have Christmas Spirit. It's my super power.

Pinterest: How Does It Work For You?

I just starting using Pinterest yesterday and I just had to share this fabulous website with you.


Pinterest is a great way for me to create my ultimate wish list. It even puts it in to a pretty scrapbook format for me. It's super easy to use with a handy Pin It add-on for Firefox. I can pin any image, article, blog, or recipe on the internet. I can even invite friends to view my pin board.


How do you get started? Go to Pinterest.com. Request and Invite. After about six hours, the invite shows up in your inbox. Alternatively, you can ask a friend with a Pinterest account to send you an invite. Tada! Set your creativity free and pin away.

Sample Pin Board

Ways Pinterest Will Work for You

• Planning a Party - Put all your ideas on to a Pin Board
• Planning a Wedding - Great way to organize ideas for food, dresses, flowers, etc. Pinterest supports collaborative boards to you can ask your maid of honor or husband for input
• Stuff I Want - Invite friends and family to view your pin board for birthday or Christmas ideas
• Bloggers - While it's okay to pin a few or your favorite posts, Pinterest is really not for self-promotion. But it is a great way to organize ideas, or 'bookmark' ideas for a later blog. Mommy bloggers are especially short on time so if you are surfing the net and come across an idea for a blog, put a pin in it! You can also share your pin via Facebook and Twitter. 
• Renovating or Redecorating - Use a Pin Board for all of your ideas
• Inspiration - It's a great place to gather funny and inspiring photos, posters, quotes, and websites.  It's a visual collection of all your favorite things. Certainly a great way to start the day!
• Recipes - Create a virtual recipe file
• Lesson Plans - If you're a teacher or a home school educator, this is a great way to collect bits and pieces from the internet for lesson plans
• Bucket List - Pin all the things you want to do and places you want to visit before it's too late!
• Reading List - Go window shopping for titles you want to read and pin them on a reading list board

Pinterest Tips

• Your Pinterest has its own url - http://pinterest.com/username. Use it!
• Use interesting and unique titles for your boards.
• Just like Twitter, you can 're-pin' posts from other pin board. There is also a mentions tool to see if anyone has re-pinned your posts
• Remember that most Pinterest users are women
• All your pins should be linked to the originating website. It's not necessary to put the link in the description
• Add a "follow me on Pinterest" button to your blog/site

Happy Pinning, everyone!

Teething, Weaning, and The Pain in My Uterus

These past few months have not been my finest.

Parenthood is kicking my ass. I have maxed out all of my energy, patience, and time taking care of one small seven month old.

Teething is a nightmare. My son is a tough guy. When he went for his last set of immunization, he didn't cry. When he bumps his head, he doesn't cry. When he tumbles face first on to the floor, he doesn't cry. But teething had the family screaming 'mercy.'

I didn't expect all four of T's teeth to come in at the same time. But they did. I'm assuming this is why no amount of pain relief worked. He just had to suffer through it until they cut through the gums. At one point, his gums were so swollen that there was a rip on his gum no where close to a tooth. I felt completely helpless. My heart was broken.

I've had some stressful jobs in my life but I could always leave work and come home for the night. And the pay was always well worth the stress. But this job of being a parent blows every other stress I've ever had in to smithereens. I was having these vivid and recurring nightmares about a Zombie-Apocolypse and the only ones who survive are the mothers and children. My Addison's starting acting up and I became a bitch. A full on get-the-f*ck-out-of-my-face bitch.

I don't like myself when I'm at 150% capacity. I take it out on T and M. And after all is said and done, mommy-guilt sets in. Mommy-guilt is an awful ailment. I wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy.

When the teeth finally decided to show their ugly (but so freakin' cute) little faces, we all took a deep breath and waited for the next milestone. Err, that happened the next day. Because T was feeling soooo much better, he started solids, crawling, and sitting in a short amount of time. T loves moving around. Even if I put him in his playpen, he will explore every nook and cranny of that playpen. He's so happy when he's in motion.

T's smile is my medicine.

Starting solids was not as exciting as I thought it would be. He was a little overdue for it but he just went with the change. He loves eating food that he can hold with his hands. (Mind you, the child has NO interest in holding his own bottle). The down side of solids is he has less interest in nursing.

I hardly need to wean. T only breastfeeds before sleeping and for snacks. He's recently cut out the 'snacks' part. I haven't had the best experiencewith breastfeeding in the past, but I was just starting to really enjoy it. Although T is ready for weaning, I was not. And then T bit my nipple. Holy Shiitake that hurts!!!

The part I've been dreading most about weaning – that awful pain in my uterus. Before T, my period cramps would knock me on my ass. I'd have to take a day off work and fill up on painkillers so I could sleep it off. I wasn't looking forward to getting those types of cramps while looking after an infant. When mother nature reared her ugly head, I was PISSED OFF. I was sure I was in the clear for at least another month. But I dug up all the muscle relaxants I could find and waited for the pain to start. It was completely different. It was a dull pain that was still obvious for the day but I was way too busy with my routine to notice. I took one Advil and that was that. Back to my 'scheduled programming.'

So now we're here already. T is almost eight months old. The trees are shedding beautiful orange and red leaves. I'm looking forward to T's first Halloween. He's such a delight to be around. He inspires me. It's the most incredible feeling in the world to watch your child light up like a Christmas tree when you walk in to the room. It makes me forget about the tough times.

Mommy Hiatus?

I didn't mean to be gone this long. I really just wanted to take a week break from my blog, Twitter, and Facebook. I went back to Twitter and Facebook after that week but my blog is dusty after a two month hiatus.

Life with baby became...overwhelming.

T starting teething. I knew this would be a difficult time for him but had no idea how challenging it would be for me. All four of T's front teeth came in at the same time.

Yes, I said 'the same time.'

You can imagine how uncomfortable the little guy was for the five and half weeks it took for the teeth to poke through. It took everything out of me. Then it took another 20% of what I didn't have. Sometimes being a mom is no fun at all.

Once T's teeth were through, he started to hit his milestones at warp speed. Sitting, solids, crawling, talking. And whenever I hear my son say 'mama', I melt in to pushover-goo. He can get away with ANYTHING as long as he calls out 'mama'.

This is the roller coaster called parenthood. Down one day, up the next.

When I finally stopped to check myself, I realized I was completely drained. I was depressed, unmotivated, and completely unwilling to do anything but the obligatory parenting stuff. And I was only doing that half-assed.

Now T and I are finally getting back in to a routine. Most of his actions are pretty predictable and easy to deal with. He loves being seven and a half months old and experiencing everything for the first time. He's enjoying life so I might as well, too.

As most of my mommy bloggers will understand, it's hard to find time for blogging and you're not always motivated to write. I especially don't like to write about the bad stuff. But being a mommy comes with bad stuff. The good/bad ratio eventually evens out but when you go two months of bad days, you certainly don't want to write a bitchy blog about how awful it is to be a mother – dare I say.

When I get stuck in a non-writing phase, I find it VERY difficult to just sit down and write again.But here I sit. Writing a blog I was completely unmotivated to write. But it's not so bad. In fact, I'm quite pleased with it. I'm looking forward to writing another this afternoon.

Wordless Wednesday - Watchin' the World Go By

Long Time No See

I am formally apologizing to all of my loyal followers. I have not blogged or tweeted in over a week. T is teething. He's not sleeping well, he's not eating well, he's not playing well. He's a bit lethargic too. So 100% of my energy is going to T. Teething pain is heart breaking - I wish I could go through it for him.

I'm going through a bit of blogging withdrawal so as soon as I get a good night sleep, I will blog. (And it will likely be about teething and such).

Miss you all. Come back soon.

Mama's Losing It Writing Workshop: Not Sure if I Should Post This

The other day, I was looking through Mama's Losing it Writing Prompts. I love blog hops, linkys, and writing prompts. I'm hoping to brave VlogTalk soon. I especially love @mamakatslosinit's prompts. They are all great titles for future blogs.

However, one prompt struck me like a ton of bricks. I shook me to the core. The prompt...

Write A Letter to Your Ten Year Old Self

The prompt haunted me. That little ten year old girl inside was terrified. You see, she's a chubby, lonely, sad little girl. I hate to see her suffer. I know that she grows up in to be an incredible human being. My first instinct - hug her like crazy, mommy style.

I started writing the letter. It poured out of me as if the spirit of that little ten year old girl was writing through me. Her poor broken spirit. I started writing about her experience with sexual abuse. She begged me not to tell anyone our secrets. I assured her that letting go of the secrets is what sets us free. She's too young to understand this.

I started writing about her experience with violent physical abuse. She pleaded, Please don't post this where people can see it. I told her that I promised my blog readers that I would always tell the truth, even if it was hard to do so. She cried, and kicked, and screamed.

I re-read the letter to her. I told her that people would be supportive and appreciate our honesty. Maybe it would even inspire someone else write a letter to their ten year old self. We are NOT the only little girl who had a tragic childhood. But she continued to beg. She was inconsolable.

So I didn't post the letter. But the adult in me still wants to.

Now I'm asking you, my readers, if I should post something – well, let's face it, this depressing. I want your honest opinion. My blog is about family and motherhood. These experiences happened to women everyday and it's entirely possible, GOD FORBID, they happen to our children. How personal should I really get here? Should I protect this ten year old inside and leave the secret locked up?

What would you do?

Listography: Guilty Pleasures

I'm linking up with Kate Takes 5 for Listography this week. Hop over to her blog and write your own list.

1. Teen Movies

Remember being a teen in love? I think it's the purest form of love and pain. You don't know any better, you choose the wrong guy and then you take him back after he breaks your heart. I'm just a sucker for these stories.

2. Grey's Anatomy

I have never missed an episode. EVER!

3. Sims 2 Video game


I haven't really been able to play a lot since T was born but I love building houses and neighborhoods. I'll be so excited when I have a few hours to sit down and build my life in video game form.

4. Little Things

I've always been excited to see little forms of things. Little Sharpie markers, little notebooks, little containers of moisturizer, little crafts for scrapbooking, etc. I'm thinking about making dollhouses in a baby food jar for Christmas gifts this year. Quirky, I know.

5 Spiral Notebooks

I have a collection of notebooks. Everyone who knows me knows that I can't resist buying notebooks. I like to write but I really only need one notebook at a time for that. I usually have about a dozen empty notebooks in my office at any given time. An empty page means a blank canvas for me.

Wordless Wednesday - Dirty Look

I imagine I will get many more of these in my lifetime...

Linking up with My Little Drummer Boys for Wordless Wednesdays.

Get-to-Know-Me Blog

I've decided to be a copycat blogger today. I'm going to copy Vivienne...Interrupted or @VivInterrupted and write a get-to-know-me list.

You can also find out more about me on my About page. (Or my Aboot page if you're a fellow Canadian. I really do say it that way.)

1. I'm addicted to Sharpie. If I don't have a Sharpie within arms reach, I start to panic. I write love notes with Sharpie. I scrapbook with Sharpie. If I don't have a hairbrush to use as a microphone, I sing into a Sharpie.

2. I stub my toes at least three times a day – hard. I'm very clumsy.

3. If you put any celebrity on the phone, I'd be able to tell you who they were after they spoke two sentences.

4. My idea of the perfect vacation is staying in a cabin up north...in the fall.

5. I have Addison's Disease

6. I dance in my living room on a daily basis. It's great for getting your 'angries' out.

7. I see auras. I don't tell many people about this because people think I'm a freak. I don't even know if M knows. I should really write a blog about this.

8. I have a horrible short-term memory

9. I have incredibly elaborate nightmares.

10. My favorite song is Into the Mystic by Van Morrison

Grocery Shopping Magic

This week, I wrote a guest post for Bee at The Juggling Act Called Life. The post is about how to be in and out of the grocery store in thirty minutes or less. Wonder over to Bee's blog for a read.

Grocery Store Magic

What I've Learned from my Six Month Old

T is six months old today. This morning, I looked at the photos from the day he was born. They are nicely framed on my foyer wall. When did I EVER have time to frame and hang photos?

I'm amazed at how fast life moves when there's an infant in the house. It really does feel like yesterday that I pulled him out of my womb. (I'm still very proud of that). T and I have both evolved and are both very curious to know what happens next. He teaches me something new every day. I wanted to take some time to reflect on what I've learned in the first six months of my son's life.

Eat, Move, Rest

Our mommy lives are always going to be VERY busy. We need to keep up with little people that have unlimited energy. Actually, we work hard to keep our babies healthy so they do have energy for physical and brain power. It just makes sense that we do the same thing. Here's what I do to for my energy level.

Don't be a Perfect Mommy

I spent the first three months of T's life trying to be the perfect mommy. I ended being disappointed in myself every time T cried. Being the perfect mommy is exhausting, frustrating, and self-destructive. Babies are forgiving. If you take too long getting a bottle or you eat dinner before they do, they'll forgive you. They don't care if the laundry is done. They don't care if the dishes are done. They just care that you are there for them.

Cry

I practice this once a week. I'm an emotional person. A good cry always makes me feel better. Being a parent is the toughest job on the planet. You don't get a paycheck, you don't get a lunch break, and you don't get weekends off. Holding your emotions in is only going to make things worse. So if the kids have been screaming all day, the kitchen looks like a bomb went off, and your youngest just fell asleep at midnight, have a good cry.

Reconnect

I'm still working on this one. I'm not a very romantic person. I know how to be sexy for M but not romantic. Since baby, our relationship takes second place. I still want M to feel special just as I like M to do the same for me. I've started writing him little love notes every day. Whether it's a silly joke or an invitation to meet in the laundry room for a make out session, I want him to look forward to the little 'blue' notes.

Like most parents say, your love life changes drastically. You can't be spontaneous and you can't limit encounters to the evening. Sometimes baby's nap time becomes play time for the grown ups. Or sometimes you set the alarm for 3 am and get frisky.

Intimacy is very important to M and I. Intimacy doesn't mean just sex. Patting your hubby on the bum as he passes you or giving him a sexy kiss when he comes home from work is intimacy. Cuddling on the couch is intimacy. Communicating is intimacy.

Pray

I'm not a religious or spiritual person. I've struggled with believing in a god my entire life. When T came along, I had to ask someone or something to protect him. I'm still not sure what or who it is that I pray to, but I have a feeling they are listening. Sometimes I pray for a good night sleep. Sometimes I pray for T's teeth to come in. Mostly I pray for T's health and well-being.

If I didn't pray, I wouldn't be able to sleep at night.

Take photos

I get it, no new mommy has time to edit, develop, and sort through photos. And who the hell has time for scrapbooking??? So just take them. Take LOTS of them. Download them on to your computer once a week. Back up the saved photos once a week. Then when the little one gets older you'll have the photos to edit, develop, sort through, and organize. You might even have time to scrapbook or frame and hang them.

Find Your-new-Self

My old life is a distant memory. I've evolved more in T's six months than I have my whole life. But I'm still learning about the new me. I mostly do this via my blog. I get to write down my feelings and rant about the shitty stuff. I also learn about me through T. All I have to do is look in to T's eyes when I'm rocking him to sleep to know that I am this kid's everything. How incredibly lovely is it to be someone's everything?

Be Silly

I get to act like a kid again. T loves it when I dance and sing off key. He loves it when I'm happy. Some days I have to fake happy but as soon as I start acting silly, I don't have to fake it anymore.

Being silly means doing something completely ridiculous. Something you would be embarrassed if your friends saw you doing it. Like the hokey-pokey. My kid goes CRAZY for the hokey-pokey. I will do anything to make my kid laugh. For T, this usually means me being silly.

Eat, Move, Rest

Eat, Sleep, Move

Our mommy lives are always going to be VERY busy. We need to keep up with little people that have unlimited energy. Actually, we work hard to keep our babies healthy so they do have energy for physical and brain power. It just makes sense that we do the same thing. Here's what I do to for my energy levels.

Eat

After T was born, I had some serious explaining to do. I'd gained almost forty five pounds during my pregnancy. Because of the Addison's Disease and being gluten free, gaining and losing weight has always been difficult for me. For T's first three months, I ate the same way I did when I was pregnant. Cravings turned in to emotional eating because of the stress of having a newborn. I gained a bit more on top of my pregnancy weight. When T hit his four month milestone, I threw out all the junk food in the house. This wasn't easy. I'm a junk food junky. I salivate over potato chips and love gummy sugary candy. I also love soda. The only way I get caffeine is by drinking full-strength Coke. But it's not practical for my life anymore.

I started eating only healthy option foods and didn't worry so much about dieting. I chose Coke-Zero, which took some getting used to. I filled my grocery cart up with fruits and was proud to walk through the junk food aisle without dropping anything in my cart. Then I slowly started eating less and less until I got to my pre-pregnancy daily intake. I've lost almost thirty pounds in two months.

I don't particularly care what shape I am these days. M and T love me the way I am and, frankly, so do I. But with fifty extra pounds, I wouldn't be able to keep up with a crawling or walking child. And I'd have to live in my maternity clothes forever.

My son NEVER stops moving. He's always squirming and wiggling his way across the floor and his body is only idle when he's in a deep sleep. I still need to eat a lot of food to keep up with him, but they are all healthy choices. I even still eat chocolate, just dark chocolate – and it's usually a once-in-a-while treat. Key word = usually. :s

Move

I HATE exercising. I know 'hate' is a strong word but I friggin' HATE it. Mommyhood made me realize that being healthy is more important than it ever was before. T is certainly not going to be happy with a mommy who takes him to the playground and then parks her lazy ass on the bench to watch.

Since T never stops moving, I figured I should keep moving too. I've decided to start by walking. I live in a great neighborhood that has everything I need within walking distance. There's really no point in taking the car half a block to pick up some fruit. If I'm being honest, every walk I have to take, I go kicking and screaming. I'd RATHER take the car, but I have to convince myself that there's no point. After I walk, I always feel glad that I went because I'm rejuvenated – even invigorated. Those are big bonus words for any mommy. I'm hoping, in the next month, to upgrade to jogging.

Rest

Sleeping/Napping is a very important part of my day. When T goes down for a nap, and I'm tired, I'll put him in the bed with me and we'll sleep for two hours. If I'm not tired, I'll lay down in a quiet room and watch a movie or read a book. As long as I'm resting, I know I'll feel refreshed when T wakes up. I try not to let the 'To-Do' list nag when T's sleeping. If I start cleaning the playroom or tweeting while T is sleeping, I'll completely miss my opportunity for resting. In some cases, I start to resent T because I didn't get a nap when really it was my own fault. So I like to stay refreshed for T.

I go to bed when T goes to bed. I chose a ten o'clock bedtime for both of us. T sleeps from ten until four, has a bottle at four, and goes back to sleep until seven or eight a.m. I'm pretty lucky that he sleeps well at night.

I use a routing for bedtime. T gets a bath, a walk around the block with daddy, and a full bottle fed to him in the dark before bedtime. The bath is his cue that it's time to wind down. By the time I get to the 'dark feed', his eyes are pretty squinty. I'm hoping to start a different routine for nap times. Right now, T's nap times are all over the place but he seems to get tired and fussy at the same times during the day.

The routines and habits will always change, but the main life elements don't. I need to eat, move, and rest to be at my best. Being at my best for T is all I ever want.

Wordless Wednesday - Roflmao

Sometimes, life is just damn funny...
(Linked up with MyLittleDrummerBoys blog)

A Difficult Phase - Advice is Welcome and Encouraged

Calling all mothers. I need some salvation. PLEASE!

My son is going through a difficult phase right now. I believe, but am not certain, that it's separation anxiety. He's six months old and every time he is not in my arms or M's arms, he's whining or crying. I can handle listening to the whining but he sounds so sad and desperate when he cries. It's heartbreaking to just leave him on the mat or in his playpen even when I'm in the same room. I've been giving 120% of myself to keep him occupied. Then I try to disengage and give him a chance to be alone even though he cries. But the cycle quickly begins again. I'm exhausted. I can't really do anything on my own for more than ten minutes without hearing a screeching cry.

I don't have time to blog - it's taken me almost three days to write this one. I don't have time to relax. I don't have time for me. M is great. When he's not working he takes T for a walk or plays with him. But he's tired from work too. How do I get through this phase? Do I let him cry it out? Do I hold him non stop and wait out the phase?

It's just me and M here. I don't have family in town, and my friends are way too busy to even ask for help. I'm leaning towards letting him cry it out but I don't want my poor son traumatized and unable to trust. He sleeps well at night – alone in his crib. Why are his waking hours spent begging (yes, it's basically begging) for our undivided attention?

Being a mommy is not all roses and sunshine. These past few weeks have been really tough and I can't see the light at the end of the tunnel. Every mom knows that a happy mommy equals a happy baby. I seem to be in a vicious cycle of exhausted, warn out, unhappy mommy = sad baby. Not really a nice phase for baby either.

Please tell me your child went through something similar as an infant. How did you handle this? Any suggestions on how I should handle this – conventional or not? Am I overreacting? Argh. Sigh.

Side note: Please forgive my absence from Twitter, Facebook, and Blogging. Obviously, this phase is taking every ounce of me.

BlogHer 'll Envy

So I'm totally and completely envious of all the ladies that are heading to BlogHer '11.

They are buying new clothes and making packing lists. They are setting up their plan of attack and they are planning 'drinks' with other blog pals. They are bringing home forty pounds of swag and making fantastic new contacts.

I've been blogging just under a year. I don't feel like I've earned my conference time yet. I feel like BlogHer conferences are a right of passage for a blogger. As of right this moment, I'm making it my goal. Maybe not next year, or the year after but by hell or high water, I'll be at BlogHer '15.

In the meantime, I'll be growing my follower list and making every blog better than the last. I'll offer funny anecdotes for mommies and share the tough times, too. This blog is my 'baby book' and my diary.

Ladies, have a blast at the conference! I can't wait to read about the trip and see all your photos. I hope to hear from you via Twitter and I'll be thinking about you when you're gone. But one day, I'll be right there with you.

Enjoy!

Wordless Wednesday - Escape Artist

My Little Drummer Boys inspired me to post for Wordless Wednesdays. But, we're bloggers, and it's hard to blog without words.



All my son ever wants to do is roll around on his play mats. But that's not safe if I have to go to the loo. So I put him in a chair or his playpen. The moment I put him in one of those 'momentary babysitters' he tries to escape. This is my little escape artist at work.

Teaching Firm Convictions

T's personality is really shining these days. M and I always joke about what traits we passed on to our son. M and I are both pretty stubborn so we both knew that T would be stubborn. We just didn't realize it would be so soon. He's silly like his mommy and smart like his daddy. So far, he seems to be the perfect combo of me and M.

M is assertive and fearless. I hope T develops these qualities. M has no problem standing up to people who are rude. I like the think that he stands up for other people as well as himself. There is never a shortage of rude, selfish, and inconsiderate people in this world so we need people like M to stand up.

I used to be afraid of confrontation. I still am to those I respect and care about. But when it comes to strangers who bud in line, talk loudly on their cells, or stop in the middle of an aisle to catch up with friends and leave no space for anyone to get their cart around, I have no problem speaking up. I hate that people are so oblivious to the world around them.

My biggest pet-peeve is the 'budder'. I don't like it when people feel entitled. The worst place for budders is Walmart. Thanks to 'self-checkouts', people line up wherever they please. Some days, there are separate lines for each checkout. Other days, there are two lines for eight checkouts. Rude people make their very own line. How convenient for them? When I observe everyone else in the proper line(s), they either roll their eyes or give a death stare. But nobody says anything. M is hilarious sometimes when he stands up to people. He'll blurt out "Lines are for stupid people like me, intelligent people like you just go wherever you want." Throw in a few not-so-friendly words and everyone else in line is laughing under their breath. He likes to make rude people feel uncomfortable because that's exactly what they do to everyone else.

I on the other hand will say something to the person in front or behind me but loud enough for the 'budder' to hear - "Wow, that was pretty rude." My mother always taught me to stand up to people, including teachers. But I knew where the boundaries were. I couldn't disrespect a teacher's opinion but I could certainly tell them I didn't agree.

The year before I was to start high school, we moved to a new city two hours away from all my friends. I needed to make new friends. One of my friends from my home town wrote me a note that contained an inappropriate poem. (We were in eighth grade and giggled every time someone said 'penis'. What do you expect?) The letter also contained a nice paragraph about how special I was to this person. I showed that part of the note to the potential friend sitting next me. Unfortunately, the 'naughty' poem was on the other side of the same page. This 'potential friend' passed it on to her friend. It eventually got passed around to the entire class. The teacher saw someone laughing and passing it to someone else. She tried to grab the note but the kid who was holding it ripped it up. She picked up all the pieces and put them on her desk. I really wanted that note back. Aside from the poem, it was a nice letter.

The next day, I was called to her desk, she'd taped up the note. I remember thinking 'are you kidding me. Really?'. She yelled at me, in front of all my new peers. She gave me back the note and told me to go to the principal's office. I stormed off to the principals office and told him that it was my third day at a new school and I didn't want to make this kind of impression on my new friends. I was livid. The next day the principal got a call from my mother. I got a formal apology from the teacher and the principal.

I will teach my son a combination of the values that M and I have when it comes to standing up to people, including those who are in a position of authority. So if T ever notices that someone bud in line, I'm going to tell him to go over to them, and kindly tell them they budded. Nobody can really get upset when a cute kid reminds them to be polite.

Wordless Wednesday - July 20

Sugar Saturday: My Top 5 Blog Picks for the Week

It's Saturday and it's time to give my fav mommy bloggers some sugar! These are my favs for the week. Thanks for the great read, ladies.

It Hurts Me Too
By: Juggling Act...Called Life
Twitter: @TheJugglingAct

This is a great blog about discipline. I love this mommy's take on toys in time outs, retaliation, and accountability. I often worry about being a pushover parent. I hope to remember some of these great ideas when it comes time to get serious about discipline.

F.U.B.R!
By: Going Left...The Alternative to Being All Right
Twitter: @Going_left

I laughed a big belly laugh when I read this. It's a bit wrong and soooo right at the same time. How many times have you asked hubby to do something and this happens? A lesson learned in listening to your wife.

Fingers Crossed...
By: Chicktuition.com
Twitter: @chicktuition

A blog about good luck and wishes. It's probably this blogger's optimism that makes her wishes come true. A great glimpse in to the life of a dreamer. And, I so tried her experiment with my fingers crossed!

The Shiny Vagina and Other Magical Stuff
By: WOOGSWORLD Making the Most Out of The Mundane
Twitter: @Woogsworld

A very uplifting post that reminded me of the day my son was born. Happy mommies and brand new babies – what a combo!

Pointing the Bloody Finger
By: Where's My Glow
Twitter: @Glowless

I was on the edge of my seat when I read this blog. A bloody mess, a trip to the doctor, and a brave little boy. A brave mommy, too!

I also enjoyed reading...

Vivien the Alien
By: Vivienne...Interrupted
Twitter: @VivInterrupted

10 Uses For Shoe Boxes You Probably Never Though Of
By: Penelope Oasis
Twitter: @_PenelopeNYC

I'm Famous Now
By: Keeping Up with the Pickles
Twitter: @MrsPickle_

The Big Boy Crib: Night #4 and SUCCESS!

Yippeee! Wahoooo! Alriiiight!

I made a tough decision last night. I didn't know whether to give in a put T's crib in our room or just keep struggling to put him in his room and try again. I didn't give in. So for that, I'm very proud of me.

I put T to bed at ten p.m. every night. When I used to put him in the cradle, he would go right to sleep and wake up at six or seven in the morning. When I put T in his crib, he wakes up again right away. I can't complain, by the second time I put him down, he goes to sleep with little difficulties. Last night, T slept from ten until four. No surprise there. I went in a picked him up and nursed him. This used to work for T. It doesn't anymore. He just realizes that he's hungry and will nurse for hours (I don't have a full milk supply). So after an hour of trying multiple things, including putting him in bed with me, I put him back in his crib awake. I warmed up a baba, and fed it to him while he was in his crib. He was asleep before the last sip of the baba. He fussed a few times after I left the room but slept until 8:30 a.m! Wahooooo! Hoooraayy! That's sleeping in for me.

I feel like I really figured it all out! I'll tank T up before bed and then give him a dream feed* around four in the morning. It's still technically 'sleeping through the night' and it's only a five minute imposition for me. Well nothing is an imposition when it comes to my son but you know what I mean.

Every once in a while T sends these signals that tell me exactly what he needs. Usually I'm too busy doing it my own way that I don't even notice he's trying to tell me something. Then it finally hits me like a ton of bricks and I thank T, repeatedly, for finally making me understand. Babies don't communicate??? Pshaw.

*Feed him while he's laying down in his crib.

The secret language of Tweens/Teens

Want to know the best way to communicate with your Teens/Tweens? Read this article from Today's Parent.

How Teens Communicate

Activities for Bored Infants

T is going through an 'I'm really bored' phase. I don't blame him. How much can a five month old do on his own? He makes this annoying , whiny, screaming noise to let me know that he's bored. If I added up all the minutes in a day he spends telling me he was bored, it would be over an hour. He makes me a very busy Mommy.

These are some activities that silence annoying , whiny, screaming noise for a few minutes. I'll share more next week.

Peek-a-boo
An all time favourite for parents and infants alike. Try these different varieties throughout the day.

• Classic peek-a-boo: Cover your eyes and when you pull them away, with a big smile, say "peek-a-boo". (But I'm sure you already know this.)
  
• Getting dressed peek-a-boo: If you use an over the head onsie, pull the onsie over baby's head, like you normally would, but when it comes over baby's eyes, with a big smile, say peek-a-boo.
• Good morning peek-a-boo: Take a light receiving blanket, gently cover baby's face with said receiving blanket, slide the blanket off, with a big smile say "peek-a-boo."
• Mommy's-exercising peek-a-boo: When baby's in crib, lunge down out of baby's site, then pop back up with a big smile and say peek-a-boo.
  

Happy in the Mirror
Whenever T is crying, M or I simply pick him up and stand in front of the mirror. For whatever reason, every time this kid looks in the mirror, he sends a huge smile to the people on the other side. I'm not sure that he knows that it's us in the mirror but he certainly likes socializing with whoever they are.

Car wash
T is learning about different textures. He's always grabbing at my and M's hair. So I let down my hair one day, kneel over him so that my hair dangled close to his face. Then I swayed my head back and forth so it would tickle the sides of his face. Just like when your car goes through the car wash.

Kangaroo
Ok, this is totally cheating but T does enjoy it. (And it's great exercise for baby's neck). If you have a Snugli or a HotSling, wear your baby while you do a few things around the house. Put a spring in your step or narrate everything you're doing. Make silly noises and have fun. I can get a few things done around the house and distract T at the same time.

Mr Fixit
T likes to know how things work. So sometimes we walk around the house and look at all the light switches. Then we turn them on and off. Or we'll go to the kitchen sink and turn the tap on and off. This also works for toys that can come apart and back together again - like Lego.

The Big Boy Crib: Night #3

Ah f*ck it!

T's crib is now a 'play' pen. As soon as I put him down, he plays with whatever he can reach - and there's not much in his crib.

Not sure where to go next. Any suggestions?

The Big Boy Crib: Night #2

Last night, in a word.... EPIC FAIL! Ok, that's two words.

It was night #2 of the cradle to crib transition. Was night number one too good to be true?

So far I've been lucky when it comes to T's sleeping. He was sleeping through the night at two months old. He takes two naps per day. He's an early riser but I can handle that by taking a nap when he goes down. But I am not used to waking up six+ times in the night. Last night was week one all over again. Argh!

The little guy had trouble falling asleep. Then he woke up an hour later, needed to be nursed back to sleep. Same an hour after that, and another hour after that. I gave up and moved him back to the cradle in my room. Probably the worst thing I can do, right?

Good thing this kid is cute! :P

Can we say Caffeine?

The Big Boy Crib: A Cradle to Crib Transition Story

When the family found out that I was pregnant, we were offered this beautiful heirloom cradle from M's sister. I was hesitant to take it because I hadn't even thought about whether or not we would co-sleep. Thanks to our pre-natal classes, we learned that co-sleeping prevents SIDS and makes night time feeds easier. T's been sleeping in the cradle for five months.

Once T was over the trauma of coming into this world, he rarely slept during the day and woke up often during the night. He would fall asleep in my arms and when I put him down in his cradle, his eyes would pop wide open. At night, he would wake up to every creak in the floor, snore, and closing door. We later learned that he had infant reflux. We gave him medicine before bed so he could sleep better. It took a couple of weeks to break the 'wake-up-every-ten-minutes' habit but the medicine worked. The frequency of the night wake-ups dwindled down to once a night.

Swaddling helped, too. T was always wiggly and squirmy, even in his sleep, so we swaddled him for night time sleeps. But he is our little escape artist and even at two weeks old, he would wiggle out of the receiving blanket swaddle. So I bought a swaddling blanket that locked him in for good. Forty dollars can buy you an extra hour or two of sleep. Well worth it for me!

The day we took him for his first immunizations, he became a completely different baby. M says that it's because he experienced something so traumatic that nothing seems bad after that. The little angel slept the whole night through. And he has every night since. Recently, he grew out of the swaddle. I put him to bed a few days ago without his swaddle, expecting him to wake up within twenty minutes. But he didn't. He slept until four a.m. I picked him up to nurse him but as soon as I picked him up, he went back to sleep so I put him back down. He woke up at seven a.m. I considered it a success.

The next few nights, I realized how big he was getting. When he started to wake up, he would kick his little feet on the wood at the end of the cradle. There was very little clearance between his head and the top of the cradle. I was forced in to making the transition from cradle to big boy crib. Ok..well..not forced. Obviously, I knew he was growing. But it was so convenient to have him next to me and I was dreading the day we moved him because it would screw up his schedule.

Last night, I plugged in a little night light, put the bumpers in the crib, hung some make-shift curtains and set up the monitors. We gave him his bath, fed him a baba, and off to dream land he went in my arms. When I put him down in the crib, he woke up. Not the wide-eyed wake up but enough that I couldn't leave him there to cry. I picked him up again and he was back to sleep within five minutes. I put him down in the crib and he stayed asleep. VERY asleep. I hesitantly left the room and silently wished him luck.

I went to bed expecting that he would be awake again in twenty minutes. I listened on the monitor and all I could hear was the hum of air conditioner. Once in a while I could hear a teeny tiny breath but I wasn't sure if that's what I was hearing. Then I started to panic. How could I let him sleep in there alone? Why can't I hear him stirring? What if he's lying there awake and scared? I'm an awful mommy! I didn't want to check on him because we have incredibly creaky floors. It would wake him if he was sleeping. But I wanted to check to make sure he was alright. Instead, I said a little prayer for him to be sound asleep and to see his little face bright and early in the morning. I lay awake for another hour worrying.

At four a.m., I heard stirring. I jumped, literally, at the opportunity to check on him. He was wide awake and playing in his crib. Yes, playing. I took him to my bed and tried to get him back to sleep. Nope, he wasn't having that. He nursed for an hour and drifted off a few times but mostly just played with my hair. By five a.m., I gave up trying and woke up for the day.

My prayers were certainly heard, I just didn't expect the universe to think that bright and early meant before dawn. The transition was a success. He slept in his crib for five and a half hours. That's incredible for such a big change. I wish for the same tonight. Well maybe with a six a.m. wake-up call and less worrying.

Cool Pool Party

Confession: I found out about these guys on Yo Gabba Gabba. It would be a fun addition to your ipod for the kids this summer! And you might catch yourself singing it once or twice.

Aquabats - Cool Pool Party on Yo Gabba Gabba

Kate Takes 5 - Listography

I thought I'd take part in Kate Takes 5 listography this week. Topic is Inventions.

A Force Field from Pain and Cooties - Wouldn't it be nice to get rid of those icky period cramps and sleep deprivation headaches forever!? I would put this force field around my whole family so that T would never feel the pain from immunizations or teething.

Free Nanny - Ok, so a nanny already exists but a nanny that doesn't charge a salary does NOT exist. So I'm inventing her. She knows when I need a break. She never leaves a dirty dish in the sink. She changes T's poopy diapers. And she pushes the stroller when we go to the park.

Post Pregnancy Lose-Forty-Pounds-in-a-Minute button - I lost 15 pounds in a matter of moments when T was born, why can't I lose another 25 a few moments later???

A Landscaping Machine - My garden is full of weeds, my backyard hasn't been mowed in weeks, and I'd really love that same front porch that my neighbours have. I certainly don't have time to do all of that!

A Shut-the-Hell-Up Button - I've become increasingly less tolerant for rude people. Especially people who use their cell phone like it's a megaphone. The other day, I heard a young lady, maybe 16, telling her cell phone that she had a UTI. Ew!

A Weather Controlling Gadget - I love it when the days are warm enough for a cute sun dress but the nights require a sweater. No humidity and no snow!

T's First Mode of Transportation

T has figure out how to rollover. I'm so amazed at how brave he is. He has not yet perfected tummy time yet but he's confident enough to roll from his back to his belly. He usually needs help being propped up when he gets to his belly but he seems upset that he couldn't do it by himself. Then as soon as he was secure in the tummy/head up position, he decided to try the army crawl. Such an independent young fella!

As I was watching T use his little muscles to swing to the side, I realized that rolling over is T's first mode of transportation. This means trouble. Because if I know anything about T, he's curious and persistent. He will roll all the way around the house if I let him.

One of T's favourite places is laying on his play mat. He can kick and flail and play. I've created a little bumper system around him so that I can leave him there while I sanitize his bottles and wash a few dishes. But those days are over. I'll have to be watching his every move.

I figured that one day I would be chasing a rambunctious little cutie around the house but I didn't know it would be this soon. I can guarantee that one of these days T will be laughing he head off as I chase him around the house, and the park, and the backyard...

The Breastfeeding Blues

I expected breastfeeding to be the easy part. I didn't research the subject or pay attention in prenatal class because I figured I would just give T my breast and he would take it.

I first tried nursing T about 20 minutes after he was born. As I expected, he had a built in radar and knew exactly where to go and what to do.

At about 2 a.m. that first night in the hospital, the baby blues hit. T was hungry every ten minutes. I couldn't put him down because he would just wake up again crying for food. I hadn't slept in 39 hours and I was terrified that my son was starving. The nurse came in to the room, saw my tears and offered me formula to give to T. I must have looked at her like she was an octopus because she said "Formula is not poison, you know? It will fill his belly enough for you to get some sleep." And since sleep was what I was after, I accepted the offer.

I have to admit that I regret this decision. I started to rely on formula because I could measure how much T was eating. I can't help but wonder what would have happened if I'd waited another twelve hours for my milk to come in. The convenience of formula was interfering with my milk production.

According to the April 2011 issue of Today's Parent, ninety percent of Canadian mothers start out breastfeeding but only half are still nursing at six months. One in three have stopped by three months. Pediatricians recommend that mothers breastfeed through baby's first year.

I hate when other mothers ask me if I breastfeed and I tell them I supplement with formula. They give me a look of pity. I'm sure their intentions are good but it hurts. I've had such insecurities about this issue. At one point, I took a prescription drug to increase my milk production. It worked really well but when I started to gain weight while on the drug, I figured it wasn't worth it. I healthy mommy is more important than nursing. But why do I feel like I'm less of a mother because I can't exclusively breastfeed?

T is four and a half months now. I nurse for soothing and 'snacking' purposes only. He won't go to sleep unless nursed to sleep. I keep meaning to start the weaning process but I actually enjoy the experience. And if I'm being honest, I want T to soak up all those nutrients he can . And I don't want to deprive him of this soothing method so early in the game.

If I could do it all over again, I would have waited the extra twelve hours to see if my milk would have been enough for him. He's a healthy, happy boy. The doctor has no concerns. My insecurities will likely pass and T will never judge me for feeding him formula.

Not-So-Extreme Couponing

Yes. I admit it. I watch that 'Extreme Couponing' show. From the first show, the wheels starting turning in my head. 'What if I could do this for my family?' So I looked it up.

I found out that Canadian couponing is not the same as American. In the U.S., grocery stores have so much competition so it's not uncommon for the store to offer twice the value of the coupon you bring in. They also allow coupon stacking which means that you can use two different coupons for one product.

Luckily, getting great deals with coupons in Canada is easy. I combine sales with my coupons. So if I have a coupon for cheese that is $3 off and the cheese normally costs $6, I'll wait for that cheese to go on sale for $4. Cheese for $1 is a great deal. It's also helpful to know that sales happen in cycles of twelve weeks. So if you have several coupons for the same thing, it's a good idea to stock up until the next time.

So today, I took my $2 off coupon for M's favourite body spray, Axe, to Shopper's Drug Mart. They were offering Axe for $3.99 down from $5.99. I was so excited about this great deal that I didn't even notice that the cashier didn't give me my change from $10. So instead of spending $1.99 on the body spray, I spent $10. A bit of a bummer for my first couponing experience.

If you'd like to know more about couponing, visit this blog and watch her videos on how to coupon. On top of her great tips, I'd recommend looking up the websites of your favourite products. Some of them have free magazines or e-zines and you can often find coupons among the articles. For example, Kraft Canada has a magazine called 'What's Cooking' that comes out 4 times a year. Almost every issue has coupons.

Most of the coupons I have come from SmartSource and RedPlum. You can look up their schedules. I confess that after those coupon catalogues come out I go for a 'recycle bin walk' and dig for coupons. You can also ask friends and neighbours to keep them for you. Everyone has their secrets.

T's Personality Milestone

Over the past few weeks, I've really noticed T's personality shining through. He smiles and laughs often and he loves to be entertained; not just stimulated - entertained. He coos for hours sometimes. It's easy to imagine that he's actually having a conversation with us. He's starting to grab at objects and not just our fingers. He reaches out of me when I'm nursing him. He loves to be cuddled.

I say this a lot - I've waited my whole life to meet my son. I've thought about what he would look like, how his voice would sound, and what kind of man he'd become. But I never thought about what type of personality he'd have. I think that's why I'm so genuinely surprised when I learn new things about him.

T's changing so quickly. I want to save every moment but I feel like my memory can't hang on to every little thing I want it to. It starts to feel like what happened moments earlier feels like a week away when the next moment happens. Photographs help me keep things fresh but they are still and T's constantly in motion. If I shot video of these moments, my computer would be at capacity.

I've also noticed that my personality is changing. I'm switching into mommy-Jenn. I have more patience. I'm a master at multi-tasking. I worry less about certain things and more about others (that still makes for a lot of worrying though). And my new idea of relaxing is washing dishes or doing laundry.

I hope the next few months are as exciting as the past 2 months have been. The next adventures include moving T to his own room and getting T to hold his head up. Being a mommy is just so much fun.

What is a Signot™?

I love being Mark's girlfriend. What I don't like is the title, girlfriend. I'm closer to his wife but I hope to marry him one day and I'd like to save the term for when I become a wife. I don't like being a "partner" because it sounds like a business transaction. The term "spouse" sounds like a house plant. "Better half" would make me the "worst half" and I'm not a fan of that.

So I asked Mark, "What do I call you?"
Mark says "Signot?"
Me: "Ooh, I like that!"
Mark: "You should trademark it."
Me: giggles

Signot = Significant Other. I like that he's my significant other because he's certainly significant in my life. And faux-trademarking the word is my silly attempt at starting a trend. But I should really consider making greeting cards for Signots™. There aren't many options out there for the person-in-your-life-who-is-a-girl/boyfriend-but-not-a-spouse.

Then maybe we can make t-shirts that say "I'm with Signot™ -->." Too much?

Finding My Mommy 'Type'

I know now that everything happens for a reason. Every crazy mistake I've made, every good deed, every regret, and every relationship has prepared me for one monumental moment - the birth of my son, Tommy.

Motherhood has always been my dream job. I know the pay sucks and the hours are long but the challenges match the rewards and the boss is pretty darn cute when he sleeps. I'm proud of myself for being so good at this job. Yes, there are times (mainly at 3am when I haven't slept for 30 hours), when I have no idea what I'm doing or how I'll live through it, but perspective hits me like a splash of cold water when I see his sweet little smile.

I'm so lucky to have the most supportive signot™ in the world. I don't know what I'd do without Mark. He knows exactly when I need to eat, sleep, and take a break. He's always encouraging and motivates me to be the best mommy I can be.

Mark and I both play a very different role in Tommy's life and the balance works out well. Mark is Tommy's best friend. I know T is only 6 weeks old but the two of them hang out and play games. T just adores his father and is already so eager to please him. Mark will always be the Dad who encourages T to climb to the top of the playground equipment - unassisted. I will always be the Mom who yells "Don't! It's too dangerous!"

It's hard to say what type of Mommy I'm going to be when my son is so young. I hope that I'll keep doing what I'm doing. Mostly that involves listening to that little instinctive voice. I hope that I'll be the one that he runs to when he has a boo-boo or the one he asks to sing him to sleep. I hope when T becomes a man, he remembers his mom as a very kind hearted, nurturing woman.

It's also important that I'm NOT a certain type of mom. I'm not strict. Bottom line. But I do NOT want to be a pushover. It's hard for me to say "no" and mean it. But I also want my son to respect me and the decisions I make. I'll have to find a middle ground in there somewhere.

For now, I'm going to be the mommy who nurtures T when he cries and feeds him on demand. I'll be the mommy who makes him smile and, hopefully soon, giggle. I'll be the mom who rocks him to sleep every night. And most of all, I'll be the mommy who loves him more and more every day.

I'm a Gluten Free Mommy

I have another blog that is all about my life in the gluten-free world.

You can check it out here:

http://glutenbites.blogspot.com/

If you have celiac disease, or are a gluten-free mommy like me, don't be afraid to say 'Hello!' in my comments box.

BabyCentre.ca is your Best Friend

This is the site I use in the middle of the night when I need the answers to "mommy questions." Great forums and articles. Sign up!

Babycentre.ca